Make Light of Situations….

So, let’s get down to some funny stuff, shall we? I’ve never been the one to be overly confident in myself. But ever since this break up, I’ve realized that there are guys out there that are attracted to me. I’m not sure what exactly it is–one guy seemed to be drawn to the low cut dress I was wearing that day, another my tattoos, and another by my beautiful mind. I guess you could say, I’m a well rounded person? I don’t know.

I’m going to start with the very first encounter I had at a bar, during the day, in San Francisco, surrounded by my dear friends. They decided to take me to a street festival called Union Street Festival. It was just like most street festivals, vendor booths lining the streets, selling dresses, food, jewelry. G had wanted so badly to have brunch at this restaurant that served various sliders and yummy alcoholic concoctions. Unfortunately, they had cancelled that for the festival. So, we walked around and admired the crafts and chatted. Our friend, V, was leaving us to fly home to visit her dad, who had been in the hospital and we all wanted to soak up as much time with her as possible.

When she had to leave, we decided day drinking was in order for the rest of us. I mean, we were vacationing with all our ladies together and none of us had anywhere to be! So we came to the place that G wanted to visit in the first place. It’s one of the only bars/restaurants in the area that has an outdoor space. Let me tell you, for how beautiful it was that day and for the amount of people that were also attending the festival, that outdoor space may as well have been a crawl space. For a girl having bad anxiety issues that week, it was a nightmare. Luckily, I was with my girls, who were completely understanding. I knew I just had to push through this moment of anxiety and just enjoy my company. So I did.

I was enjoying the one of only cocktail I had that day and I noticed this very tall man that kept looking at me. He had some facial hair, was wearing an outfit I would associate with casual Friday attire at a law firm, and just seemed to be a little out of place.

At first, I thought I was going a little crazy. Maybe he was not looking at me, but at someone around me. After he ordered a drink at the bar, he started in. Ugh.

Guy: My name is Blah Blah (sorry can’t remember!). What do you do?

Me: My name is N. I work at a school right now.

Guy: But what do you WANT to do?

Me: Uh well I’m thinking about a PhD because I think I want to be a professor

Guy: No, but what do you WANT to do?

Me: I’m sorry, what?

Is it so hard for someone to believe that I am 27 years old and am not sure that I know what I WANT to do for the rest of my life?! I mean, believe me, I am a pretty motivated person. I love the career path that I am on and would love to stay in this place, but I don’t know what my forever is going to look like. Especially at the time of this conversation. I had only been out of what I thought was my forever relationship for a week. So committing to anything, even a choice of where to eat, was a difficult task for me. Don’t worry, though, this conversation continued.

Guy: Well it’s my 41st (OMG) birthday and my friends and I came out here to celebrate. Where are you from?

Me: I live in Atlanta, but I grew up in Palm Springs

Guy: Oh! I live in Santa Monica, I work for some firm doing some stupid shit that you probably don’t care about (sorry, can’t remember that either). I don’t think I want to do this forever. I’m pretty conservative. But I just tell myself what I WANT to do all the time because eventually that will be what I do.

So, this part seemed like a good idea. I mean, if we want to change our lives or want something for ourselves, we absolutely should tell ourselves that it is what we are going to get. Isn’t that the whole concept of that book The Secret? You have to put it out in the universe that you will get something, and then you will get it. Simple as that. I was starting to get more intrigued by this weird back and forth even though I kind of felt like this stranger was asking me some deep questions about my life that I was not ready for in an overcrowded bar. But then, he made it even worse.

Guy: So you said you were from Palm Springs, right? You know, Obama is going to be there this weekend.

Me: Yep, I heard

Guy: Well, my boss actually found that house for the Obama’s that they will be staying in this weekend.

Wow. Please let me get into your pants right now. Yeah, no. He then reminded me throughout the conversation about three more times. The more times he said it, the more badly I wanted him to go away. He had a friend that came over and started talking to me. The friend was so much more relaxed and did not seem so involved in pursuing me. I actually enjoyed his company. The Blah Blah, in front of me, started arguing with the friend.

Blah Blah: Dude man, wtf?! I would never come up to a girl you were trying to talk to and start talking to her. What are you doing?

Bro casually walks away after some inaudible banter.

Me (in my head and to AI, my friend who was standing next to me): Uhh I’m standing right fucking here.

Are all guys this desperate? I doubt it. But it was just so weird to be pursued in this way. I can’t lie, I loved the attention, but I just wanted to have a good time with my girls. And I think I’m going to continue to focus on that. It’s a good story to laugh about, though. Word of advice to guys, read the signs. Body language tells you everything. If I am clearly moving away from you and turning toward my girls, it’s your cue to go hang out with your bros. Especially on your 41st birthday.